Memory

I'm in whirl.
Stuck in the center.
Being blown this way and that.
Every once in a moment,
I feel like the old me.
I'm trying.
I see a long road.
I'm tired.
I'm remembering those days
where I walked without pain.
At least I have those in my memory.

~ JC ~

There Are Times

There are times in life when one is reminded of the past.
It comes up in a conversation.
Almost like it was walking by and stopped to say Hello.
Only it's not a welcome visitor.

I had one of those talks today.
In the midst of explaining how goofed up my extended family is,
I was reminded of something that happened a long time ago.

It surprised me how it was like it just happened.
Those memories of what was.
I found myself crying.
The feelings were too deeply rooted.

I pretend a lot about my in laws.
They are a weird bunch.
Not welcoming or kind at all.
To the look, they seem fabulous.
People love them.
Only not when the doors are closed.
Not when the claws come out.
Not when they call you, yelling.

I put up with this for years.
Finally, I stopped.
It meant a real break.
The perfect look they were going for was no more.
Blame me. Always say it was me.
Only as I sat back, letting their tongues wag,
time went on and others noticed.
Questions were asked.
I had to explain what happened.

And, today was one of those days.
Where I said politely but truthfully what was.
The reasons I did not attend these so called family events.
The times that I sit at home and they go without me.

It isn't me.
It's them.
The people who I do not want in my life.
The upset that they cause is just unreal.
And, this perfect family who pretends
is finally being found out.

Just like I knew they would be.

~ JC ~

Note ~ My husbands family is the kind you

hear about. The kind you don't ever want to be a part of.

The kind where they do the snide remarks and make it

look like you caused it. The kind that could drive

someone crazy. Thinking was it you. Nope, never was.

And, my children were kept away from these people.

Recently, we let them be around our almost grown

children. I did surface. I'm good at that. I waited.

And, they showed who they are. My children are

both wondering why we do anything with them.

I tell them that I was forced to for a long time.

That I do not anymore and that they do not have to

either. Only you do wonder, when will this all go

away. When ...

I'm Too Old For This

~ x o ~

Maybe it's just that I'm getting too old.

I don't know.

I got this cold. It seems semi easy.

As easy as a cold can be.

Nope, it fooled me.

I'm going into week two.

Terrible. Lousy. Yucky.

I need a break from this sneaky thing.

Add in that my back went out the day after

and well, I'm a mess over here in the woods.

I can't bend over to feed the Purr and Fur Gang.

I can but that includes a scream or two.

The cold / cough is just nasty.

Just when you think it's going away,

It add something new to the main attraction.

I'm just too old for this.

Two weeks of coughing.

I need a vacation !!!

~ JC ~

Danger

Spring arrived and left me with a cold.

I've been thinking of

 Julia Roberts in Pretty Woman.

Nasty little suckers.

Taking everything I can think of.

Just when I think I've won,

nope, the sore throat comes back.

The voice is going today.

That's ok.

I didn't have too much to say.

The back went out yesterday morning.

And, I mean really really out.

Been using everything I can think for that too.

Ice packs and pain sprays.

It's a double special this week.

Why ?

I leaned over to refill my Siamese's water dish.

Yes, that's a hard one to do.

Should have had a DANGER notice on it.

Been dealing with sharp pain all day.

So, Nasty Little Suckers

just seemed like the right thing

to explain what ails me lately.

I still like Spring though.

In case you all were wondering.

I'd just like to walk and bend over.

That's not too much to ask for,

is it.

Bubbles In The Sun

Spring has finally arrived in my part of the woods.

The sun is out. The rain is gone.

The green moss is everywhere but that's normal.

I am surrounded by the birds singing.

At night, beyond my fence and in the woods,

the frogs are singing all night long.

This happens every year.

Won't last too long but for now,

it's very nice to hear.

We had a lot of snow last month.

Everyone is saying what a warm Winter it was.

Not for me. It was very cold and snowy.

In the last two weeks, we got snow five times.

Crazy I tell you. Just nuts.

So today, while the sun got lost, I will enjoy it.

Still too cold to go out back but so nice to see.

My cat, Riley, is watching bird tv.

He does know how to enjoy a bubble bath in the sun.

I think he dreams of it during those colder months.

Anyway, Spring has arrived.

And, today is a good day here in the woods.

~ JC ~